My husband and I recently
gave a presentation at a local Senior Center.
The day before I met with a staff member who helped me through their AV
setup, and the next day he made sure his staff person had things running
properly even though he himself was away. I called the following day to thank
him, and could tell from the defensive tone when he answered that he was
anticipating something bad – and that negative feedback was most of what he got
in phone calls. He was, I think,
pleasantly surprised that I had called to say thanks.
Likewise, a few weeks ago a
friend and I dined at Mon Ami Gabi in Bethesda. The service was so terrific we
actually called the manager over to compliment our server. He, too, was surprised, and I’m sure passed
it along to our server (and hopefully noted it for future performance
appraisals.) My sister-in-law sent a lovely thank you for her birthday gift, and over the year's the painfully printed thank yous from young relatives are always cherished. Mary Lehman, my local
Council representative recently sent me a handwritten, personal note thanking
me for a donation.
This got me to thinking about
the power of Thank You. All too often in
our hurried society we’re easy to criticize (and trust me I’m not immune to
this). The personal thanks (as opposed to the review on Yelp/TripAdvisor etc).
is in many ways more powerful. It
establishes a connection between you and the person who did something. It acknowledges that an effort was made, and
appreciated (note: I didn't say you had to love the gift). We could have put a review
on Yelp about our Mon Ami experience – but would it make as big an impact on
the manager as an actual customer taking the time to comment on something
good? Maybe, though they certainly would
also appreciated the latter, I’m sure.
Mary could certainly send an email or typed note – and given her brutal
schedule I wouldn’t have faulted her at all.
Yet the personal thanks made a real impact – and says something positive
about her commitment to constituents.
Close family are not immune
from the thanks benefit. Do you thank
your spouse/partner for something he/she does that may be routine – like getting
you a cup of coffee? Did you remember to
thank aunts/uncles/grandparents for the birthday/Christmas/Hanukah gift they
sent? Just because you’re related does not mean they are obligated to gift you, nor does it absolve
you from basic Miss Manners courtesy. And,
families/spouses being well, families, and
spouses, the absence of thanks may not be commented on, but is likely noted.
Think of it this way. Saying takes very little time, and generally
costs nothing more than a minute or two. It makes the recipient feel their efforts were
appreciated. And that’s worth a lot.
Any way, Thank you for taking
the time to read this posting. I really appreciate
it.
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